my stressful days. .

soooo. i think i'm gonna write today. i have alot to talk about. i haven't written in here for like a month or so.
so i went to state ffa in brookings. we left on sunday at noon. i sat with matt all the way up there. we got to the hotel and i hung out in matt, jordan, and bebo's room for most of the time. we went burger king and then we went to walmart. i had to go cuz i had to get a shirt, nylons, and black socks.. and we just messed around in there.. it was pretty fun. we had to go to a session that day. sooo we got all dressed up in OD. we all look so cool in OD. so professional ha. but after that, it got done at like 9:30. so when we got back i just chilled in my room with beth and lynze. beth is sooo messy. she had her stuff everywhere! it kinda got annoying, i had all my stuff in the little chair next to my bed. we ordered pizza that night. mmmm it was so good. but we went to bed at like 11:30, cuz we had to get up at 6 to shower and stufff.
monday: got up at 6, first one to shower, blew dried my hair, straightened and the whole 9 yards. so got in OD, and went to another session. kinda boring. wanted to sleep lol. got back to the hotel and chilled for a bit, i went swimming for about a half hour. i was only in the hot tube, it felt really good on my stressed back. i needed it. i could use a back rub also right now ha. so i showered again after that and got all did again lol. had another session, went back to the hotel room and changed and touched up a bit. then went to the dance. i had a really good time at the dance, i had to go and get a drink cuz i was really hot and started to sweat, i came back and to what to seeeee. i seen trevor and paige grinding! yeah i was majorly pist. i can't really explain the feeling. i wanted to cry. matt got in my face and said it was alright. i screamed at him saying it was not all right. he better get the fuck off of her. they better stop now. i didn't do anything about it. i wish i would of gone up to them and stopped them myself and made a big scene or something. but i didnt. i sat there and watched them. beau came up to me and asked if i wanted to dance. he said if he can dance with another girl than i can dance with another guy. so i danced with beau the rest of that song + another song. then after that trevor thought he could dance with me. she he started dancing with me. i told him to go dance with paige again, and he said he would rather not, so i barely danced with him. he left and i think he went and told paige something but idk what he said. and brock started dancing on me so i'm like ok, brock you wanna dance? and he's like surrrre. so we started dancing, and trevor came back and he was like what the fuck?! he's like whatever and he left. so i'm like whatever i'm gonna keep dancing. you left so whatever. then after that i'm like where'd trevor go and no body knew. so i'm whatever god. so i went and got a drink and went to the bathroom to cool down a bit. then i came back and brock said that trevor asked where i was, but he left again. so idk . and then the last song came on and zach bies asked me to dance so i'm like surrre i guess i can do that. so i started dancing with him and i found trevor, he was standing off to the side, i think he was watching me or something but i don't really care. so dance got over and i followed matt and jordan out and we sat there for a couple min. trevor came up behind me and said i'm leaving, peace. and i'm like yep. bye. i texted him and i'm like wow more fuckin secrets. and he's like what. whats going on. what are you talking about. i'm like really. you had to jump on paige once i left huh. real sneaky. and then he like blew up on me. i told him not to talk to me and then he's like way to be mature, i'm like way to piss off your girlfriend. then he's like i can't believe your associating yourself with me. i'm like i don't have to. he's like do what you got to do. then i said ok really. i about cried when i seen you with paige, but i guess you do what you got to do. and yeah. then he didn't respond after that. so i just went to bed.
tuesday: woke up at 6:20ish, showered, blow dried hair, and threw it up cuz i didn't really want to do anything with it. so went to the session and blah. i texted trevor saying "what do you want with me" he was like what, what do you mean. i said it was a pretty straight forward question. and he said idk. what do you want to happen. i told him i was unsure. i don't remember much. but i told him i don't feel like there is much loyalty, honesty and respect. he said he doesn't lie to me, he is loyal.. which really isn't true. i told him he doesn't really respect me that much. and he kinda agreed. and i asked why. and he said it doesn't matter. and i asked why it didn't matter. and he said he would tell me in person cuz he didn't want to tell me over text or something. kinda makes me worry. .
but yesterday we got back at 3, i took a nap when i got home from school. woke up at 6. went and tanned with my mom while she worked out a bit. then got home, ate supper. i went walking at 8 by myself. it was good. i like excersing or however you spell that. i invited trevor to go with me so we could talk but he didnt, even though he said he would. so i walked by myself. and then he invited me over at like 9:10. whick i had to be home at 9:30. so i was only there for like 10 min maybe. cuz it took me some time to walk there. seth was there. he told him to leave. so i crawled up on him bed where he was and sat there. it was 3 min before i had to leave. he's like so start talking.. i didn't really want to start something that was not going to get finished. he's like if your not gonna talk i'm gonna go work out. i'm like god, i'll leave. so i got up and left. he went and worked out, i went home and went to bed.
and now i'm here sitting in spanish, writing this novel. not really paying attention.. but i thought i would write in this for a bit since i haven't written in here and i have alot to say.. so kels i hope this takes up your "bored" time lol.
i didn't cover some of the stuff but i got most of it. ha