yesterday we had a game. i was really motivated to do anything. i hung out with trevor for about an hour. but it only seemed like it was 15 min. but it was better than nothing. the jv game went pretty good. i play pretty hard and well i think. always room to improve. i try really hard because i really love the game. i'm out on the court worry about nothing but gettin that ball in that round hoop with the net. hustle, work, push, slap, trip, fall, miss, and oh maybe a couple points here and there. i love to score. its such a great feeling. like you helped your team to get that much closer to winning. the things i hate about basketball is practicing and the coaches yelling. like really we just want to have fun. we win when we have fun and lose when you scream at us and think its just strickly buisness.
bells gonna ring. next period. half hour study hall and then spanish :/
alright. i'm in the spanish room writing.
anyway. basketball. i played all 4 quarters of the jv. i was only suppose to play 3 and go get ready for varsity at the end of the 3rd quarter but mcgregor left me in there. oh well i guess. i'd rather play with jv i think. both mcgregor and durfee apoligized to me. it wasn't that big of a deal to me. i mean i would love to play more varsity. but not just go in and come right back out. i would actually like to stay in and play for a while. show them what i got you know. we were in baltic. i seen becca. she was there with her little sister miranda. becca is beautiful. i wonder if she came there to see me, see how i actually played or if she attends activities all the time. i really wanted to go over there and talk to her maybe give her a hug. but she would probably have been like wtf. we never talk. like what the hell or something. idk. i think we made eye contact a couple times. cuz i would look at her and i think she was looking at me. or at least in my direction. i think i seen her smile once, but not at me. i think at her sister the guy next to her. idk who he was. just a person.
so today. i just want to go home. like every other day. i'm tired and have really no motivation. no homework so far. had a test in history, reviewed or something in english, finished my worksheet in geometry and here i sit in 4th period. maybe get spanish homework or maybe bio. but we're finishing the movie in bio and ag. never get homework. 6th hour is my study hall. i enjoy that.
i think me and trevor are doing great right now. talking. hanging out. enjoying each other. no sexual stuff. which i love not doing. we just hold each other. its such a great feeling. i love the feeling of his body against mine. i don't regret talking to matt. i'm still gonna talk to him. he gave me a perfect point that i can still talk to him. its called trust. he told me himself he isn't going to try to get with me or anything while im dating trevor. and trevor and brooke talked about the time when matt and brooke were dating. so we should be fine. matt gives great advice. i love talking to him. he's really nice and funny. but i love trevor. i hope he knows that. i feel safe and secure in his arms. i just want to be there the rest of my life! but i have no idea where life is going to bring me. i'm only a sophomore. he was saying that he was thinking about marriage and kids and stuff already. well i'm to young to be thinking of that right now. give me some time.
but maybe i'll write later. i have to go and take some pictures for my spanish assignment that is due today hehe.
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